I remember at the early stages of my pregnancy I was obsessed with these perfect Instagram moms who chronicled their beautiful pregnancies from start to finish. This would be me. I saved the posts that inspired me the most and so began my beautiful journey to motherhood... or so I thought.... but there was one problem. I HATED being pregnant.
Not liking being pregnant has nothing to do with wanting to have a baby. I know there is often a lot of guilt around admitting that you're miserable during your pregnancy. You're supposed to be thankful and appreciative and so excited for your new baby. You can be all those things and still be miserable about the tiny human that won't stop kicking you in the vagina. I promise it doesn't mean you will be a bad mom.
My pregnancy was hell. And while I realize that there are pregnancies that were a lot worse than mine, for me, it was the worst 9 months (almost 10) of my life... with the exception of a few moments such as the ultrasounds and the cute little kicks that didn't knock the wind out of me :).
When I think back, below are some of my all time fave things about my pregnancy (I am being sarcastic for those of you who didn't read the first paragraph... shame on you for skipping to the juicy stuff):
1. Swelling: Who doesn't love retaining water? Doesn't that mean you can survive longer in a drought? I was swollen. Everywhere. It started at around month 5 of my pregnancy and progressively got worse. I had cankles that were as thick as my thighs and at one point, I was so swollen that I had rolls around my neck! Imagine being so swollen that your neck doubles in size? I was a sight for sore eyes I promise. #IWillSurvive
2. Weight Gain: Obviously all the water retention also led to weight gain... a lot of it. Near the end I had gained almost 100 pounds. I would say that 40% was water, 60% was cheeseburgers because when you're miserable and can't see your feet what else is there to do but eat? #MomBodLove
3. Nausea: I had nausea for about the first 3.5 months of my pregnancy. People would comment on my pregnancy glow... yeah I'm red from throwing up my lunch but thanks...and let me tell you... there is NOTHING more romantic than your husband leaning in for a kiss and you having to tell him: "I am going to throw up in your mouth if you don't move out of my way" as you make a dash to the washroom. #RelationshipGoals
4. Sweating: If I just sat on a chair breathing, you would think I had just finished a spinning class at the gym. I'm really not sure if it's the hormones, the weight gain, my body trying to cry because it was so unhappy.... but you sweat All. The. Time. I probably would have showered 20 times a day if I could have managed to lift my shirt over my head without it getting stuck around my fat swollen neck. #PermanentSweatyGlow
5. Crying: People love the blame the pregnancy hormones for our emotional mood swings ... but c'mon... wouldn't you cry if you literally couldn't sit down on a toilet without getting stuck? Or if your stomach was so large you couldn't bend down and pull up your own pants? #PregnancyMomentsToRemember
All in all, pregnancy was a miserable time. The happiest moment of my life was when I gave birth because I finally had my son in my arms and because I wasn't pregnant anymore #WorstMomEver.